ABC of Potty Training

It probably seems like just yesterday that you changed your baby's first nappy, but before you know it she'll be ready to start potty training. While there's no magic age at which a child is ready to start using the potty, most toddlers will develop the necessary physical and cognitive skills between 18 and 24 months of age (though some aren't ready to start until they're as old as four). 

A - Assess your child's readiness 

Most people begin training when their child is about two, but some kids may not be ready until well into their fourth year. Watch for the right signs, such as imitating others' bathroom habits, and don't pressure your child to start before he's ready. It's worth running through a basic checklist to see if he is ready. 

B - Buy the right equipment 

First and foremost, this means investing in a child-sized potty or a special seat to attach to your regular toilet. Whichever you choose, make sure your child can stabilise himself with his feet so he can push when he's having a bowel movement. You may also want to pick up an explanatory picture book or video for your child to help him get interested in training. 

C - Create a routine 

Sit your child fully clothed on the potty seat once a day - after breakfast, before his bath, or whenever else he's likely to have a bowel movement . This allows him to get used to the potty and accept it as part of his routine. If he doesn't want to sit on it, that's okay. Never restrain him or physically force him to sit there. And especially don't push the issue if he seems scared. 

In both cases, it's better to put the potty away, or at least aside, for a few weeks or a month and then try again. If he's willing to sit there, fine. But at this stage, don't even try to explain why he should use it; you just want him to get used to the thing. Make sure it's always in a convenient place - since it's portable, your child's potty can be used in the garden or the playroom.

 D - Ditch the nappy 
If he gets the idea and produces something, that's fine. But don't push him to perform. Again, wait until he's ready and demonstrates a clear interest in using the toilet on his own. 

E - Explain the process 

Sit your child on the potty seat without a nappy. Again, let him get used to what it feels like to sit there this way. At this point you can start explaining that this is what Mummy and Daddy (and any older siblings) do every day. That is, undressing before you sit down to go to the bathroom is the grownup thing to do.  

F - Foster independence 

Encourage your child to use his potty whenever he feels the urge to go. But make sure he knows that he can tell you, too, and that you'll take him to the bathroom whenever he wants you to. If you can, let him run around sometimes without a nappy (or any clothing below the waist), with the potty nearby. Tell him he can use it whenever he wants to and remind him occasionally that it's there if he needs it.

It may help to show your child where his bowel movements go. The next time he goes in his nappy, take him to his potty, sit him down, and empty the nappy beneath him into the bowl. This will help him make the connection between sitting and producing. After you've emptied his potty into the big toilet, let him flush it if he wants to (but don't make him do it if he's scared) so he can see where it goes. Teach him to dress himself and wash his hands when he's done. 

I - Introduce night training 
 Even when your child is consistently clean and dry all day, it may take him several more months or years to master night training, so don't throw away his nappies just yet. At this age, his body is still too immature to reliably wake him up in the middle of the night just to go to the bathroom. You can help cut down on wet nights by not letting him drink too much before bedtime and telling him that if he does wake up in the middle of the night he can call to you to help him get to the potty. You can also try leaving his potty near the bed in case he wants to use it.

 G - Grab some training pants 

You may like to try using training pants. Some children like them and they help, others just think of them as a slightly different type of nappy and they defeat the object of the exercise. Some children are encouraged by having real underwear instead.

 H - Handle setbacks gracefully 

Virtually every child will have several accidents before being completely trained during the day and at night. Don't get angry or punish your child; after all, it's only recently that his muscles have developed sufficiently to allow him to hold his bladder and rectum closed at all. Mastering the process will take time. When he has an accident, calmly clean it up and suggest that next time he try using his potty instead. 

 J - Jump for joy - you're done! 

Believe it or not, when your child is ready to learn this new grown-up skill, he will. And if you wait until he's really ready to start, the process shouldn't be too painful for either of you. He will eventually be trained, and you won't have to think about it again - at least, not until the next baby... 

Is your child ready?

• Has regular, soft, formed bowel movements 

• Can pull their pants up and down 

•  Imitates others' bathroom habits (likes to watch you go to the bathroom, wants to wear underwear, and so on) 

• Makes a physical demonstration when she's having a bowel movement (such as grunting, squatting, or telling you) 

• Has words for stool and urine

• Can follow simple instructions (such as "Give me the toy.") 

• Understands the physical signals that mean she has to go and can tell you before it happens 

•  Dislikes the feeling of being in a dirty nappy 

• Has "dry" periods of at least three or four hours (this shows their bladder muscles are developed enough to hold their urine in and store it) 

What works:

• Waiting until your child is ready

• Taking it slow

• Making a plan

• Praising your child

• Accepting that there will be accidents

• Starting too soon

• Starting at the wrong time

• Putting on the pressure

• Listening to your mother-in-law's advice

• Punishing your child

Other Tips & Methods that REAL MUMS have found helpful & worked for them:

• Sing a song on the potty

• Read a book whilst sat on the potty

• Use a special potty- You can get ones that have a 'magic' star or something in the bottom that when liquid hits it, it appears, or a musical potty.

• Use a timer- Set a timer to every 20 minutes to start with to take them to the potty/toilet, then gradually increase the time.

• Target practice- Works well for a boy, Put a flushable Item (confetti,shaving foam) or a ping pong ball that doesn't flush away & get rewards for aiming.

• Dye the water in the toilet a different colour.

• Go over the top on praise

• Celebrate with stickers- Make a chart and when the chart is full the child gets a reward.

• Put your child in charge- let them use the potty on their own, wipe themselves and tip the contents of the potty away.

• Get rid of the pull ups- Children often don't know the difference.

• Character pants- Tell your child that 'peppa pig' with be upset if you wee on them. It worked for me.

• The right clothes, try to put your little ones in easy pull down & up clothes, dresses are very handy for little girls.

Click here for a link to successful potty training designed especially for boys: http://www.babycentre.co.uk/toddler/pottytraining/forboys/

Click here for a link to successful potty training designed especially for Girls:

http://www.babycentre.co.uk/toddler/pottytraining/forgirls/